Archive for the doubt Category

“Coming Soon to a Blog Hop Near You!”

Posted in blog hop, doubt, evil, fiction, ghost, horror, interview, life, The Journey, writer, zombies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 10, 2013 by brentabell

“Coming to a drive-in near you this summer, three college students on the last night of spring break, will find out the road to Hell is paved with good intentions…and blood.”

Ah, the good old days of the movie trailer.  Believe me, there was really a time when the preview didn’t tell you the whole movie in a two-and-a-half-minute bit.  The preview teased and made you want to see the movie.  Alas, I’m afraid those days are long gone.

But fear not, thanks to D. Alexander Ward (go and check him out, this I command!) I’m here to give you a preview.  Think of it as the opening to a date with that special person.  You both snuggle together while the sun dips out of sight and the darkness creeps along the theater grounds until the projector fires up and brightens the night with its magic.  Writing really can be that dramatic and I’m here now to give you a peek into my mind and my work.  I’ll try not to lead you astray or to give away too much because to be completely honest, I want you to have questions and buy the book to see if your thirst for answers can be quenched.

So, sit back and dim the lights.  Relax and let me take your hand and give you a tour through my work, a Neverland of blood and betrayal.  Eat your popcorn and enjoy the show…

What are you working on right now?   At the moment I’m finishing up the last few chapters of my second novella, Southern Devils.  I also have three top-secret projects going on with other authors and my first full length novel set in the fictional town of White Creek has been started on.  There are also a few odd and end short stories, but I’m focusing on the big things right now.  Southern Devils is the opening of a trilogy and there are three other novellas or novels that I have written out very detailed notes on.

How does it differ from other works in its genre?  Southern Devils is my take on zombies and how the Civil War’s closing days was a battle between a resurrected group of Rebel soldiers and the Union soldier ordered to eliminate them and eradicate all trace of their existence.  The approach I took with the zombies was that they are driven by their mission.  They retain some of their humanity, but also must deal with the ramifications of what they’ve become.

What experiences have influenced you?  Since I was a child, I loved to write and make up really outlandish shit.  Once I hit about the age of 12, I was introduced to Stephen King and television shows like Tales From the Darkside, Monsters, and Tales From the Crypt.  From there the die was cast and horror became my game.  I did some writing in high school, but between everything else in my life at the time, it got away from me.  Now fast-forward almost 20 years and I’m finally taking my dream back and making a go at the writing gig.  So far, it has been a magical ride.

Why do you write what you do?  I like to explore the dark side of things.  That noise outside?  It’s a long-lost love come to give you a final goodbye kiss.  The voice in your head?  It’s the darkness in your soul begging for blood to spill so it can be released.  Horror isn’t just a genre for ghosts and vampires.  It is a genre that defines who we are deep down in the human condition.  What causes someone to go on a brutal killing spree?  We don’t really know what went on in that person’s mind, but it’s my job to be the voice of his conscious and once we start to listen to the little voice in the back of our heads…that is when the fun begins.

How does your writing process work?  Before I begin a new story, I jot some quick ideas down in one of my notebooks and I let the idea stew for a few days.  When I pick it back up again, I like to know the opening line and where I want the story to end up at.  I do admit, there have been some stories where the story took on a life of its own and became what it wanted to be.  I love those kind of stories.  There is nothing like hitting a point while writing and thinking, “Wow, I didn’t see that coming”.  As far as how I work, I sit behind my cluttered desk and I get some words in while I play on the internet

What is the hardest part about writing?   Finishing.  The hardest thing for me is finishing something once I start it.  I get involved with another project and I start to push things off and I tend to fall behind on the stuff I’m not committed to write.  I’ve been finishing Southern Devils for far too long and I get irritated with myself.  Some of my foot-dragging, I believe, also stems from the doubt issues that still creep into my head about a piece.  For example, no matter how much people have told me they loved In Memoriam, I will always think I could have done better and will mess with something until I want to rip it up because I don’t think it’s good enough.  I’m getting better about it and I’m gaining more confidence in my work with every new acceptance and every new review.  The thing that has gone the farthest in settling my mind is the other day a stranger stopped me and told me how much they loved my book.  When they followed about how they couldn’t wait to read my next one, my eyes damn near teared up.  It really put my mind to rest about my work and has really invigorated me since it happened.

What would you like to try as a writer that you haven’t yet?  That one is easy, I want to write a screenplay for one of my works or have a story of mine adapted into comic form.

Who are the authors you most admire?  The ones I admire the most are the ones who have been there with a piece of timely advice, a story about when they were starting, or those who take the time to help and encourage a new author.  In no order I admire for their words and deeds:  Brian Keene, Robert Ford, Kelli Owen, Tim Lebbon, James A. Moore, Christopher Golden, and John Everson.  Each has given me a new insight or a new way to see the field and I thank them all.

Who are new authors to watch out for?  There are three that I’m working with now that come to mind.  Each one has some work out there and everything I’ve read by them has been a fantastic read.  Go and check out Julianne Snow, Jason Darrick, and Dale Eldon.  You can’t go wrong with any of them and each one brings a distinct voice and subject matter to the horror field.

What scares you?  Failure.  I don’t want to fail in this and it drives me to keep improving and challenging myself to write better and have my work show how much I’ve grown and improved.  I also fear for the world I’m leaving my kids.  No, I fear for the world and what my kids will do to it if they have the chance…

Now, I was to give you three places to go and check out.  I’ve been tied up with work and other stuff that I can only offer you two authors to continue on this Blog Hop.  Next Wednesday, Jason Darrick and Armand Rosamilia will take the reigns over at there blogs and give you the answers to the burning questions above.

Stop back by Friday night when I give my thoughts on, The Compound,  the debut novel from Robert Ford and he stops by to enter the Arena and answers “The 10 Questions”!

Goodnight…

At Horrorfind 2011 at the signing table after my reading.  Only one book and if I did it today it would be over twenty.

At Horrorfind 2011 at the signing table after my reading. Only one book and if I did it today it would be over twenty.

Finding My Way in a Strange New World

Posted in doubt, evil, fiction, horror, In Memoriam, life, self doubt, writer on June 3, 2012 by brentabell

Social media can be great to get the word out about stuff and to connect with others. Before this Internet thing, reconnecting with old friends, classmates, or new people was more difficult. Now we have Facebook, Twitter, blogs, and tons of other services under the sun where can communicate with others (I take that back, I really don’t want to read about every second of your life spelled out in painful detail on FB or Twitter). The new methods of communicating have also made it easier to build a base and get your name out to the world.

I find myself in that position now. In Memoriam, my debut novella, is in the editing process now and with a fall release in mind I have to do some things that really are different for me. Like most authors out there now, I have the Facebook fan page, the Twitter account, the Amazon author page, and the blog (please like them all or follow them all!!!!!!!!!!). My job now is to go forth and grow my brand and name so when the book drops, I won’t hear crickets. This is hard for me, because I’m really a quiet introverted kind of person. I’d rather be home alone instead of in a big crowd. I’m social when I have to be, but before I backed away from attention. I’ve always had a circle of friends, but it never extended out very far. I can talk to people at anytime, but it’s not my first choice.

All this is changing however. I’m in the process of building up the different avenues of me there are to follow and connect with. The experiences I’ve had so far have been really good and I’ve started to come out of my shell a tad. Pimping myself still makes me a little uncomfortable, but I’m taking it in stride (like I’m not going to be the pimp following you down the street trying to sell you a girl or some weed for five blocks straight). I’m a new writer, I’ve only been doing it for two years now. I’m learning how to make all this I’ve created work for me to connect to new people, fans, and fellow authors so I can be the best I can be.

Well, I’ve had my say for the evening. Right now there are two shorts, a new novella, novella edits, and the novel to work on. Oh, one last thing…if you want to see a movie that is schizophrenic, go see Snow White and the Huntsman. It wants to be two different movies, but comes up short because of it’s lack of identity. They really had some good stuff, but failed to do anything with it. It is dark, the costumes and acting were superb, (except the girl from the sparkling vampire movies…she couldn’t act if her life depended on it) but when it tries to be a great retelling of the story or a teen flick (only because of the vampire franchise chick who can’t act) it fails. Overall, it is watchable, but wait till it hits a discount theater or rent it.

Goodnight…

Some Random Musings…AVENGERS!!!!!

Posted in Avengers, doubt, evil, fiction, horror, life, Muppets, reading, Rymfire Undead, The Reaper Rides, Undead Tales 2, Wicked East Press, writer on May 5, 2012 by brentabell

Ok, I’m going to take a moment to wax poetic about The Avengers Marvel Studios did an incredible job bringing their superhero franchises together in one big kick ass movie.  It helped they had this planned all along with each movie adding something toward the whole (if you stayed after the credits that is…).  The outcome was one of the best superhero movies ever made.  If you have not seen it, go fix that right now…I’ll wait…just go.  They also set events in motion for the second Avengers movie and I can’t wait to see one of my favorite comics villains on the screen.  It was funny because only a handful of us in the theater knew who it was.  I know DC plans a JLA movie, but they are getting to the party late and have to relaunch all their franchises to get it set up.  I don’t want another Batman reboot, I want a fourth Chris Nolan Batman flick! 

Enough about that and now some random thoughts.

1. Watched the new Muppet movie again tonight and in all honesty, it brings a tear to your eye.  I have some, let us say depressed, moments in my life where I let the inner darkness take hold and I spiral down into a bad place within myself.  I’ve had this issue again lately and it screws up my writing because I begin to doubt myself and what I write, like each word is testament to how bad I am.  The movie’s ending is really uplifting and I needed that message right now.  No matter how bad things get and when everything hits rock bottom, there is a dignity with pushing forward and holding your head up high.  Kermit’s speech about doing that was a badly needed pick-me-up and brought a smile to my face.

2. Pugs want to rule the world.  I believe they would already if they weren’t so lazy.  If my pug is how the rest of them act, I’m surprised they found the will power to stop eating and procreate… Hey, I call ‘em like I see ‘em.

3.  My experiment with writing a story with another author is going really good.  He’s liked what I’ve contributed so far and that’s gone a long way to silencing the doubt that had crept in again.

4.  Father Grim’s Storybook from Wicked East Press is now at the printer.  When it becomes available in a few weeks, I’ll be happy to see my story “As I Crossed Lincoln Bridge” in print.  The story was really tough to write and is one of my favorite pieces.  It is based on a little known rhyme and when I took it dark, I took it reeaallllyyyy dark.  As a father of two sons, the ending was the most gut-wrenching thing I’ve ever written and it haunted me for a few weeks afterward.  Putting myself in the head of the father was rough and led to the ending being what it is.  The ending in the book was not the one I planned, but grew organically out of how the story had taken hold of me.  The cover is sweet too!

5.  Don’t forget the contest if you haven’t signed up to follow the blog yet.  May 15th is the date and the winner selected from all blog followers is a signed copy of Rymfire Undead’s Undead Tales 2 with my story “The Reaper Rides”. 

Well that should do it for tonight so,

Goodnight…

The Reflecting Pool

Posted in and the Scarlet, doubt, fiction, horror, KnightWatch Press, life, review, self doubt, writer on January 29, 2012 by brentabell

Looking down at the still water, I pull out a penny from my worn and tattered jeans.  Glancing down at the copper piece I close my eyes, make a wish, and flip it into the still glass-like pool.  The coin plunges through the surface and sinks to the bottom while the serene water above forms into waves and spreads throughout the pool.

The pool is how I feel about everything right now.  I want to be calm, to take my time, and get done the things I set to do.  Every time I finish something or I don’t (or can’t) get my goal for a story complete, I beat myself up pretty bad over it.  The waves breaking up the quiet still of the pool are my doubts.  I have doubts about me, doubts about my work, and doubts about if anyone one day will really care.  Sometimes I go back and read through something in a book and I’m amazed somebody liked it, I mean really liked it enough to publish it.

I don’t know why I feel that way, I really don’t.  Why do I have such self-doubt?  I have a nice shelf with the books I’m in, I have a nice little blog that a few people visit, and I have a bright future according to some, but why I can’t I just enjoy it? 

I write for myself and tell the tales I like to read.  If other people like them, that’s great (I demand at least token payment, or a contrib copy, or a nice discount on copies – no ‘for the love of’ projects that give you zilch – why should a publisher get the $$$ while an author gets zero).  I guess all I’m saying is maybe deep down in the dark reaches of my soul…I do what some recognition, some kudos.  I feel like as a new author trying to stand on my own two feet, I am fighting for a little respect.

Ok, I’m done with that for now.  The site will be going over to a regular website domain in the near future, I have the cover art for The Blue, the Grey, and the Scarlet below, and I will be adding book reviews into the regular rotation.  The copy for the first book review is on the way and once I read it, I’ll tell you about it.  The plans for the book signing are under way and it will be this fall.  More details later as plans get hammered out.

Oh yeah, the cover art…

 

Well, I have some things to write about and one great secret of a writer’s life just became clear to me.  With that said…

Goodnight…

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